Sunday, January 18, 2009

The Official De Stijl Guide to Investigative Reports That Would Perplex Me And Yet, Not

1. "Inessential organs: You're not really using them. Can you get paid for them?" (Ideally, to be accompanied by video of some guy in an alley carrying a Styrofoam cooler with "SPLEEN" scrawled across it in Sharpie.)

2. "Buddha's Hands: Who actually eats these, and do they scare cats?"

3. "Mo' Money, Mo' Problems: Are Some in Your City Making This Trade-Off? Should You? The Hidden Dark Side of Mo' Money Tonight on Action News 13."

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